Sunday, 20 November 2016



Occasionally a breeze will cross my face and offer a biting reminder that the external world holds all sorts of unexpected surprises. You by far have been one of my favourite surprises. Since the first day we sat across one another at Sneaky Dee’s you captured my gaze with such ferocity that I didn’t even try to look away knowing that it was futile. Truth is I didn’t want to look away. Before words are shared between strangers there is an entire environment to decode and our innate senses kick in with light speed calculations and observations. The way your hair gracefully bordered your face, the way your nails shone in the light, the way your body made nearly undetectable movements of breathing – in and out, in and out. Anyone else and I wouldn’t even notice their breath; they could be dead for all I know. But your body beat as loud as any drum I’ve ever heard. Yet somehow, beyond the deafening perceptions that immediately stole parts of me I wanted to receive back in a heart shaped box, your eyes opened secrets to the universe that I had stopped looking for. I was enchanted. Simply put I knew that you were special and I wanted to do anything I could to express my knowledge of this. So with my blood coursing at the tempo of an excited beat I would visit my friend where you worked hoping for an opportunity of catching another glimpse. Of exchanging words beyond a casual hello so that you would be aware of my own wonderment in all things ugly and beautiful. With determination on my side we eventually shared a seat, some ideas and an orange. I was so enamored and yet also confused. You seemed distant, closed and uninterested. I’ve been on the receiving end of many emotions and intentions but yours were undetectable and I was cautious of moving – forward, backward, up or down. Until it was time to move on and we went our separate ways. Since that day I have had an unquenchable desire to be with you. To lay with you and share a universe of love that fills my very being. Not many people have experienced the unconditional emotions within me that often lay dormant like a tired volcano older than time. For you they erupted in a display of complete chaos. There was no order, no design, and no caution. Just reaction. I was unprepared. Since that first encounter we’ve had the pleasure of meeting again on a few occasions and yet the results are always the same mixed signals: a kiss and a push back against any other advances. I don’t know, maybe I have missed your clear messages that you just are not into me. But I know how special you are and my goodness do I want to offer the ancient knowledge that has been imparted to me in my DNA. To close my eyes and simply be with you. To share your space and have you in my own. To speak without speaking. You are the universe and I’d like to express my gratitude.

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